Wednesday, February 23, 2011

What do you live for?

For my english comp class I am reading the book Cancer Ward by Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn. This is a book about men who are in a cancer ward for different types of cancers with different types of backgrounds, one Pavel is a working man inside the Stalin regimen, Kostoglotov was a solider who was sent to the ward to heal, and Vadim sent himself to this ward to finish his lifes work. In this ward they must re-evaluate their life and one reads in a book "what is it that man lives for". Each has a different answer: work, education, their country, responsibilty..etc. But the book says man lives for love.

This question brings to mind in my own life "what do i live for?" It took me a while to figure out what it is that I as a human being live for. But it came down to the following: family, friends, myself and yes love.

I live to make my family proud of my accomplishments through good grades in college, proving to them that I can live on my "own" and that I can make my own important decisions. I want them to be proud of me, never ashamed to admit that "Chelsea Nee? why yes she's my daughter, niece, granddaughter...etc". I love my family and do not want to let them down.

I live to have a good time with my friends, to be there when I am needed and even when I'm not, I want to be the kind of friend that they know will drop everything just to listen to them talk about a crush, a family issue, or just for them to vent and offer advice or a hug. I want to be helpful but also be someone to go have a good time with. Which has proven to be a good thing, I am the first person most think of to go on an adventure, to go to the mall, or even to come over and hang out.

I live to make myself happy with choices in life. I stick to what I believe in even if someone else has a different opinion. I have my beliefs, that may not match someone elses but I am proud of them for they are something that I know in my heart is the right thing. I want to be able to look back on my life and never regret something that I have done but look back and say "Yes I had fun getting here".

I live for love, from friends, family, animals, and hopefully from a man who will be proud to call me his own. One day I would like to find the man out there that will love me the way that my grandfather loved my grandmother. I want to have friendship and have a lover in one wonderful person. I cannot wait to maybe start a family one day, or even just devote my life to some animals and another person. I have so much love to give I cannot wait to meet the right person who will love me equally back.

But this week I leave you all to think about "What do you live for?" Take a moment to look around you and really think about it.

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